Jersey turns 10 tomorrow. And, when I think about that, a lot of emotions come up for me.

It has also gotten me thinking about the passage of time.

Time is weird. We never see it, but it’s always passing.

The other night, I was in her room with her as she was getting ready for dance. While I laid on her bed, my attention went to a canvas I had made when she was a newborn. It was her and I, laying on the ground with our faces as close as you can get to one another. She was 6 days old. Then, I looked up from the photo and my attention turned to her now. An almost 10-year-old. Standing in her mirror putting her ponytail up for dance. What a crazy juxtaposition.

That photo of her as a teeny baby was taken almost 10 years ago. TEN. YEARS. AGO.

In some ways, 10 years feels like a really long time in our lives. For Jersey, it’s literally a lifetime ago. But at the same time, it wasn’t so long ago either. I still have such vivid and emotional memories of the day she was born. I remember my precise emotions the very second she entered this world. It was much quicker than Madden’s entrance. And, I had an overwhelming sense of my Grandma Betty’s presence at that moment. I’ve always said, I believe Jersey has her soul. 

Even now, I feel so many emotions thinking about it. When I think about how long ago that was already, my first emotion is sadness. My heart aches to think that the time went so fast. How could it be? Then, in the next breath, I feel so proud that we’ve had so many great moments in these 10 years. First day of school jitters. Last day of school elation. Spring break in Mexico. Learning how to write, and read, and what it means to be kind. 

I mentioned to the kids the other day how weird it is to think that we’re not going to all live together in the same house forever. That aches my heart a little bit. But I’m also excited to see what’s next. I’m excited to see how their next 10 years look and what they’re going to be.

Even as they grow up and move out, it’s not like everything is over. It’s going to be harder to be involved in their life as they get older, because when they’re no longer little, they won’t need us as much. Our family life will look a bit different. But, as with any evolution, I think we’ll find new ways to intentionally spend time together.

In the last 10 years I have done a really good job of keepsaking moments in their life, through my phone, and video. I keep seeing the throwback pictures on my phone and on Instagram. It’s like my phone and Insta know when I need to be reminded to be intentional. They just pop up a photo of my kids as babies and BAM, I enter a state of pure intentionality. The other day I saw the sweetest photo from a past Valentine’s Day when Madden was 6 and Jersey was 3. I just sat in my car, staring at the photo – sitting with those emotions of nostalgia and a hint of sadness. 

I’m proud of having captured all of those memories to look back on. Even though those 10 years are gone, the memories will live forever. I am also grateful for how easy it is to capture those memories, as compared to my parent’s generation. 

So I’m going to continue to make sure that I keep recording ALL the moments. Because the next time I’m looking back on 10 years worth of Jersey’s memories, those memories are going to start at this moment, this week.  

So, you know from reading these posts, I always say that our focus is a choice. Well, this week I have been asking myself, what am I choosing to focus on as we build memories from this moment on for the next 10 years?

Instead of being sad about the time that has already passed by, I’m going to focus on the time we still have. I choose to focus on how amazing and full of love those remaining years are going to be.

I’m going to live as intentionally as ever.

It’s easy to take everyday life for granted. But I’m going to pay attention to the beauty in the everyday moments together just as much as the extra special ones.

Birthdays are a great time to slow down for a moment to reflect. But it’s every day – in between the birthdays –  that really matters. All of those experiences and feelings in between are what make our life what it is and worth celebrating.