Bowling is a game of anticipation.

You’re anticipating what ball you’re going to use. You’re anticipating how the oil is going to move. You’re anticipating how that’s going to force you to move on the lane. You’re anticipating how others are going to play the lane. And you’re anticipating how that’s going to affect how you’ll be able to play the lane. You’re thinking about how the lane will develop and what ball you’re going to throw and where and how. Then you need to anticipate that you’re moving lanes every game and the next one is going to be different. So I’m anticipating that even though I’m lined up now, it’s about to be completely different again because there will have been a whole different group of people that were just on the lanes before me. You can never get too comfortable with how the lane is behaving. You have to anticipate that things are always changing. Oh, and then there’s typography. You have to anticipate that the lanes will have a different typography.

When we’re (the women) bowling with men, the lanes develop totally different than when you’re bowling with women. Men have a lot more rotation and they just carve a deeper groove in the oil and that forces the women bowling with them to have to face what they are doing to the pattern. That’s just the reality of it. And it’s true for everyone. At my recent mixed doubles event, I anticipated that I was going to need balls to get down the lane and delay the hook and move left. That’s not how the lanes developed though. I needed a ball that read sooner. And almost all the balls I brought did not do that. I had anticipated the lane a certain way, with what it was going to do, and it didn’t do that.

You also need to leave room to anticipate that sometimes things aren’t going to go smoothly. Maybe there’ll be a breakdown and it will leave you waiting until they fix the lane. Our hands also fluctuate. Your fingers may swell and the grips become too tight. You need to anticipate that your hand might get swollen and it doesn’t fit in my ball properly anymore. So, in the moment, what am I going to do to solve that problem? Some solutions are simpler than others, but you really have to anticipate these things and think, if these things happen, what solutions can I rely on?

You might not always get it right.

Sometimes everything develops in a way that you didn’t anticipate at all. Then what?

That is probably the most important to anticipate. And how it will affect you.

That part is about anticipating your attitude. Preparing your mental game.

When everything appears out of control around you, and when nothing is going “as anticipated,” can you still stay focused on the things that you can control? When you’re struggling, how are you going to react?

Can you tune out the others crushing it on the lanes around you?

At my first World Ranking Tournament, I thought I had anticipated everything. I had every ball in my bag and what I thought was every base covered. And then play started and I was looking around me and at the lane with all the confusion in the world. I just wasn’t doing well. There were so many factors to consider and I just wasn’t understanding what was happening.

My ball rep, Rick Benoit, was there with me, and he represented all these bowling balls I was throwing. He was there to help me make good decisions. So I looked over at him, desperately hoping for enlightenment.

“I. Don’t. Know. What. To. Do.” I confessed.

And he came through, helping me make the best decision of the day. But his response had nothing to do with ball choice or technical lane play. He told me, “just go up there and feel lucky.”

Lucky? In a moment I was feeling completely out of control. But what he was doing was reminding me the one thing I can 100% control. My attitude.

I had been trying to understand and anticipate every detail of the game perfectly. But he was telling me to just consider my approach instead, my mental approach.

So instead of trying to feel like I needed to understand and anticipate everything perfectly, I gave myself space to feel positive energy instead. And you know what? I ended up winning that event.  In the middle of the event, I had been feeling completely confused and lost, but by the end of it, I had risen to the top spot. It had nothing to do with bowling perfectly, ball choices, or perfectly anticipating the lanes. That day my mental approach alone turned things around for me.

Something kind of switches in your brain when you focus on the positive. You attract more of that really good energy. So while bowling is a game of anticipation, and you can attempt to plan and anticipate every detail of a game, that has its limits. The only one thing that you can anticipate for certain is your control over your attitude. And that is the most important detail in the end.

I’ve reminded myself of this simple truth ever since, especially in high-pressure situations. I don’t believe winners must always perfectly anticipate everything, but I do believe winners are the ones who maintain positive energy, especially when nothing is going as expected. And, I will admit. It’s a very hard thing to do.

Some days you will win on the lane. And, trust me, I do love the feeling on those days. But some days you don’t win the lane game and that’s okay too. As I’ve said many times before, the culture of winning isn’t just walking away as the champion. The culture of winning is setting yourself up to walk away from every game a champion. No matter the actual outcome of the game. That is the real “win.” Focusing only on the lane win is missing half the lesson.