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For parents · Launch price

Out of the Settee.

No one teaches parents how to handle the pressure. Until now.

How to support your competitive bowler without adding pressure, so they can bowl with joy, confidence, and freedom. The playbook I wish more parents had before I ever stepped onto a lane.

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$9.99 launch $29.99 · 80+ pages · Instant PDF · 30-day money-back
Launch · $9.99
Out of the Settee: How to Support Your Bowler Without Adding Pressure. By Diandra Asbaty. A guide for parents of competitive youth bowlers.
Watch first

Hear it from me.

A minute with me on what it really takes to support your bowler, and why I wrote this book.

Out of the Settee · A note from Diandra
You love your bowler. But sometimes, that love feels heavy.
You're not failing. You're just missing the manual.
From the introduction
Diandra Asbaty leaning in to talk with her daughter at the bowling alley
Why I wrote this

I've seen the best and worst of youth sports parenting.

The difference between a child who thrives and a child who quits is almost never talent. It's the environment their parents create.

This playbook is everything I wish I could tell every parent sitting in the stands, gripping their coffee, wondering if they're doing this right.

You are. And this will help you do it even better.

Diandra
What it does

Three things, on every page.

The playbook isn't theory. Every chapter walks you through what to say, what to skip, and how to show up, so you can be the parent your bowler actually needs in the moment.

01

Understand the emotional game.

What's actually happening inside your bowler (the nervous system, the identity, the inner critic), so you can support without overstepping.

02

Know exactly what to say.

Scripts for every emotional state: after a win, after a hard block, in the car on the way home. The exact words that land.

03

Simple daily tools.

Routines, rituals, and check-ins that take minutes, and shift the way your bowler experiences competition.

The chapters

Fourteen chapters. Plus one bonus.

Built to read straight through, or pull off the shelf in the moment you need it most: the morning of a tournament, the car ride home, the night before the big one.

01
The Moment Everything Changed
Chapter
02
Your Presence Is The Anchor
Chapter
03
The Dashboard Dialogues
Chapter
04
The Night-Before Routine
Chapter
05
The Reset After a Hard Block
Chapter
06
The Identity Shield
Chapter
07
Tournament Day: Your Presence Is the Environment
Chapter
08
The Big Event Emotional Map
Chapter
09
Scripts for Every Emotional State
Chapter
10
The Tournament Day Checklist
Chapter
11
When You Want It More Than They Do
Chapter
12
What If: The Questions Parents Are Afraid to Ask
Chapter
13
When Your Child's Confidence Breaks
Chapter
14
Your Bowler Is Becoming Someone
Chapter
★
The Weekly Check-In Ritual
Bonus
Your presence matters more than your advice.
Out of the Settee, Chapter 02
A young bowler reading Out of the Settee
In your hands · In their season
What's in the playbook

More than a PDF. A reference for the season.

The playbook is designed to be read once and used forever, so when the next tournament comes, the next hard block, the next car ride home, you have something to reach for.

You don't have to figure this out alone anymore.

Choose your format

Two ways to read it.

Same playbook. Same chapters. Same scripts. Pick the one that fits how you read.

Launch · $9.99 Digital · PDF

The PDF playbook.

Instant download. Read on any device. Print it out, mark it up, share it across your household. The fastest path to having it ready before the next tournament.

$9.99Reg. $29.99
Get the PDF →
Paperback · Soft-bound

The paperback.

Hold it in your hands. Pack it in your tournament bag. Keep it on the kitchen counter for the season. Built for the parent who wants the real thing.

On AmazonSee current price
Order on Amazon →
From parents who've read it

Real moments. Real shifts.

"
"What to Say When You Don't Know What to Say." That chapter hit home for me. When he lost, or when he was struggling, he wouldn't talk to me. And everything I said and did was wrong. After reading that chapter, I had to apologize to him. It was interesting, informative, and a real eye-opener.
NY
Nidiea Yarbrough
Parent of a Junior Gold bowler
"
Out of the Settee is a powerful tool for any parent of a competitive athlete, especially if you weren't an athlete yourself. Diandra's mindful approach to handling pressure was an eye-opener for me. This book gave me the tools to handle both the hard moments and the good ones with more grace, support, and love.
JM
Jodi Mann
Parent of a Junior Gold bowler
"
I used to think I was helping by giving my son tips in the car. After reading this, I realized I was adding pressure. The scripts alone changed our entire relationship during tournaments.
JL
Jennifer L.
Parent of a Junior Gold bowler
Common questions

Before you buy.

Is this only for parents of elite bowlers?
No. This is for any parent whose child competes: local youth leagues, state tournaments, Junior Gold. If your child cares about bowling and you want to support them well, this is for you.
I don't know anything about bowling. Will this still help?
Absolutely. This isn't about technique or lane play. It's about emotional support, identity protection, and nervous-system regulation. You don't need to know bowling. You just need to love your child.
What if my child is older, high school or college?
The principles work at any age. The language might shift slightly for older athletes, but the core truths about presence, identity, and pressure remain the same.
Is this a physical book or digital?
This is a digital PDF, delivered instantly after purchase. You can read it on any device or print it out.
What if I've already made mistakes?
Chapter 12 is written specifically for you. Repair is always possible. You haven't messed this up. You're just learning. And so is your child.
Can I share this with my spouse or co-parent?
Yes. One purchase = access for your household.
The next tournament is coming

Out of the Settee. $9.99.

The next car ride is coming. The next hard block is coming. Be ready with the words, the routines, and the presence your bowler needs you to bring.

Get the playbook · $9.99 → For yourself instead?

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