A few days ago I arrived in Grand Rapids, MI. It’s the site of USA Bowling, the Youth Open Championships, and Junior Gold. The most important job I have this week and next? To be “mom.” Madden qualified for Junior Gold and Jersey will be bowling in the Youth Open Championships. I’m so excited to sit behind them and cheer them on in Jersey’s first ever Youth Open Championships and Madden’s first ever Junior Gold.

Madden has prepared a lot for this. He even recently read my favorite mental game book, “The Inner Game of Tennis,” and took notes. It’s been helping set his mindset around competing. I can see from the way he bowled the EYT event last Saturday that he’s ready for this. He was less emotional and more focused on what he can control. He knows what to do and that he’s just there to do his best. As long as he stays out of his way, and just takes his time, I know he’ll do great. I know that he’s prepared. And I know that he’s capable. But there’s no pressure or expectation. If any moments don’t go as well as he’d hoped, I’ve reminded him to really focus on just enjoying the moment of being there. Setting your mind right is so important at these types of events. And I know he is going in with the right attitude. I’ll also be there to give him any extra positivity he needs. 

Honestly, that’s what makes me most excited about this week. I get to just be behind him and support him at the event. That’s not something I get to do at EYT. I try to watch him as much as I can but because I’m running EYT, I am literally running around the place – talking to parents, helping my staff. I see all of the kids there with family behind them every single shot, except my kids. John usually has to work on those Saturdays too.  I have always felt like my kids get the raw end of the deal at EYT. So now at Junior Gold, it feels amazing to be able to be there for every single shot.

Going to Junior Gold always brings up so many memories for me. I bowled the very first Junior Gold. It was 1998, in Reno. Back in the day, there was one only squad. ONE SQUAD!!!! Now there’s something like 30. I remember how significant the entire event felt because it was where the Junior Team USA was going to be named. I bowled with some really well-known bowlers like Missy Parkin, Nathan Bohr, and Sean Rash. I was 18 so I also remember the feeling of being looked up to by younger players and how important that felt. They could see I had integrity when I was competing. I remember what defeat felt like too during the tournament, that feeling in the pit in my stomach of not knowing if I would recover from a bad block. But then I always did. I always finished really strong.

More than anything, I remember the memories we made off the lanes in Reno. I remember like it was yesterday how we were addicted to playing games in the arcade at a hotel called Circus Circus. We kept trying to win carnival games and prizes. And I remember the time that I spent with my family, as well as how grateful I felt that they spent their money to fly me across the country to compete in this big national tournament. I realized that not everybody has those same opportunities when they’re young.

In last week’s EYT announcements, I mentioned a lot of these points to prepare my EYT players for Junior Gold. The first point I really emphasized was the fact that the experiences off the lanes are going to be the memories that they’re going to remember years later. While they may think the most important thing that they’re going to do is bowl, that’s actually not it. Years from now, they’re going to remember the memories they made away from the lanes with friends and family. Overall, they’re not going to remember all of the details on the lanes as much as they remember how they felt off of the lanes. Unless they win. Then they’ll probably remember that the most!

Other advice I gave last weekend was to stay in the present moment and keep a strong attitude no matter what happens. Never give up. It’s never over until it’s mathematically over. The perfect example of that is Erin McCarthy at the US Open this year. That’s the hardest tournament on our pro tour, and she started out the first two games dead last. Then, she went on to win the entire tournament. You can have a bad game but you are not that game. If you keep a strong mental game, your game isn’t over because of your bad shots. It may be really hard to make up the pins from those games but it’s not impossible. Erin is proof that it doesn’t really matter how you start. It’s how you finish.

On that note, I also reminded them that spares win tournaments. Bowlers shouldn’t take that for granted. Just because you’ve shot thousands of 10 pins before, that doesn’t mean you don’t need to take extra time to execute. Be super diligent about your spares! Spares WILL help you make that next cut!

No matter what happens though, keep in mind that one tournament doesn’t define you. Even though many of my EYT Bowlers are excited to have made it to Junior Gold, I told them that how they do there is not going to make or break them. Colleges aren’t going to not want them because of how they bowled there if they don’t do as well as they would have liked. It’s important to have that healthy perspective going into an event this big. They might be going into it with a lot of internal pressure. That’s when it’s important to build that mental grit. Really focus your thoughts in the right direction. Don’t focus on things you can’t control. Don’t look at the scoreboard. Just get yourself lined up as best you can. Stay positive. Let it go when it’s over. If you have a bad block, let it go. If you have a good block, let it go. And I do see that my EYT bowlers are really developing that mental grit. That’s why I feel like they’re going to be best-prepared bowlers at Junior Gold.

I wish everyone luck at Junior Gold. Whether you’re a participant or supporting friends and family, may you embrace the experience of it. I think about everything that is happening in the world right now and feel comfort in knowing I can escape to this pocket of the universe where strikes are thrown, and the community is tight.