My birthday was last Friday.

And, as many do not love celebrating their birthday. I DO. I think it’s a great time to reflect on the last year and look forward to the next. 

To celebrate another year around the sun, I took a boat ride with friends on the Chicago River. Afterwards, we hung out at a really cool brewery that has old school arcade games. It was the perfect way to spend time with some of the people I care most about in the world. It was on a Friday, around 3pm and I was so touched that so many of my friends found a way to leave work early to be with me.

The idea of turning a year older doesn’t bother me at all. Yet, birthdays do make me think about the passage of time, in general.

Time isn’t infinite.

So, how are we being intentional about our time?

That is the question that this birthday brought back to the forefront of my mind.

When I take stock of what is my most important focus right now, it’s an easy answer. My family. My kids.

Thinking about that led me to take myself out of the summer’s last two PWBA events. I had signed up for the PWBA events in Detroit this week, and the Trios a few weeks ago in Arkansas. In total, that would have meant another two weeks of bowling this season. On the one hand, I was truly looking forward to them, especially the Trios, because it’s a PBA and PWBA bowler paired up with a PBA50 bowler. It was the first type of event like this and I was so excited for it. 

It’s a difficult dilemma in my brain. I’m a competitor who always wants to show up to compete. I also know that I’ve been throwing it pretty well lately, and I generally would like to see where that goes, the opportunities that brings.

But time is moving so fast.

Before I know it, the summer will be over. There’s only a couple more weeks before school is starting again. And there are a limited number of summers left to just be with my kids and hang out with them. While they are still kids. I won’t have my kids home forever. So summer weeks together like this are actually really precious.

I really just want to hold my kids close and not miss out on their lives. I’m just not willing to sacrifice that time.

So, as much as I want to compete, I have an even greater desire to be with my kids before school starts. The opportunity to be with them is a fleeting one. I really want to simply enjoy what remains of this summer with them.

I have zero regrets about my decision not to bowl these next two weeks.

For much of my life, bowling was a focus in the forefront of my mind. Now it doesn’t need to be the central focus anymore.

I think sometimes athletes can get sucked into thinking there’s only one choice – to be out there competing.  And that when they are not, they should feel bad about not being there. I admit, I did feel a little bit of that guilt.

But, I really don’t feel sorry for my choice. Because that’s just not how I approach making choices. I think it’s important to make a choice, believe in it, and then really stand behind it. No regrets.

Be unapologetic about how you feel about the decisions that you make for your own life.  And also – don’t make choices based on what you think other people want you to do. Or maybe based on the decision a previous you would have made, years ago. Always go with your gut. 

And, my gut? It was longing for a few more summer weeks with my family.

I can be both a mom and, at the tournaments I do attend, a dedicated bowler. I am both, and I love being both. I don’t stop being a mom when I step onto the approach at a tournament just as I don’t have to stop being a bowler the weeks I take off from a tour to dedicate myself to my family.

In my heart, I’ll always be a bowler. How often, or which tournaments I attend, will never change that.

The beautiful thing is that there’s no “right” choice. There is simply your choice. How you focus your time is your choice to make, no one else’s.

How do YOU want to focus your time? That’s all that matters.