When you know who you are, and live in that strength, you naturally lead others to find the strength to do the same. This world needs strong leaders.

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Amanda Gorman. She became a household name last month. (Wow, right? I find her sooooo inspiring, I got chills watching her deliver that brilliant poem.)

The world needs more of that. We all need more of that, but especially with our youth. When you’re young, there’s such a desire to fit in. Young people often just sort of live in a bubble, so easily influenced (and so much of it is not good) that they don’t realize their power of their own identity at all. They are living by comparison. And, most of the time it leads to very toxic feelings.

If I could talk to all those youth bowlers on social media comparing themselves to others “filtered” lives I would say this to them: “Don’t worry about all the other noise. Just live intentionally and genuinely, based on who you are.”

This is the advice that I live by, and tell my students, almost every day too. No matter how others understand you, be YOU 100% of the time. That’s where to start anything because that’s all that matters. But, it’s so hard to do, am I right?

I really feel strongly about individuals of any age taking a look at their lives and asking themselves the question, “who really am I and what is my power?” I feel that owning that power in our identity is the route to a successful and richly fulfilling life. But the sad truth is, most people usually don’t even know their own power. And most people ask themselves if they are enough when the answer is, “you’re enough if you are truly being you.”

I was with my 18-year-old niece over the holidays and that helped me in trying to remember what it was like being 18. It’s a hard time in life. So much going on. I get that. So I certainly won’t say it’s wrong to not know your own power at any stage in your life.

I know it’s not always easy or obvious, especially when you’re younger. I didn’t have it all figured out when I was younger either. I was just singularly focused on being the best bowler I could be but I really feel like all that ended up helping me realize my own “Beyond the Lane” identity. Obviously, bowling gave me many titles over the years, but more than that- bowling set me up to figure out what I was made of. There are so many parallels between sport and life, that bowling just helped me build up my identity, and success in life. I wasn’t always focused on thinking about my bigger picture or power. That’s just where bowling helped me end up. I think about those that don’t have a sport or something like it, and I imagine it must be so much harder to navigate life and find the power in who they are.

My journey is mine just as yours is yours. In the earlier stages of my life either, I didn’t seek to change the world nor was I focused on becoming a leader. I just wanted to bowl, and (of course, win).  But leading others has gradually become my clear focus because that’s who and where I am now today.

Now I am dedicated to showing people that they have so much more power than they know, just by truly being themselves. And I will say that once you realize that power, it’s actually more like a superpower.

And I think that’s the secret. You’re not supposed to know it all right away. And sometimes you just need to be shown the way, taken along the path to get there. So when everything lines up just right for you, and you do step into that power, you’ll see what more is possible. And when you see it, you may even see, just as I am now, that it’s so much more empowering to lead with it.

In my house, every morning when I drop my children off at school I ask them what the rules are for the day. And, every day they tell me, “Be Kind and Be a Leader.” If you are those two things, you will have everything you need in life.

I created my Elite Youth Tour to empower young bowlers and to form a movement of youth energy, youth leading youth, inspiring one another with what they can become. I wanted them to see that they can truly make a difference and be anything they want to be. And it’s so thrilling watching leaders emerge and seeing them surprise themselves with their capabilities. It’s all part of my greater pursuit off the lanes now, which is my stepping up as a leader, and showing others what is possible, in life as much as in bowling.

I’d say that now, in this leadership role, I’m living my best life. Leading my students and the EYT bowlers to seeing their own powers is so fulfilling, every single day.

So, I’m curious, what’s your superpower?