The PWBA Tour started this past week. Being on the lanes in Rockford, IL reminded me to dig into that feeling of what it means to be ME and appreciate where I am, who I am, and what I am doing in the moment.

I’m reminded of the lyrics to a beautiful song by The Avett Brothers, “Decide what to be and go be it.”

I have bowled calm. I have been present. I decided that I was going to commit to the process. I would make sure my head stays down, and I don’t focus on things I cannot control.

When I am out on the lanes, I am not thinking about what I did yesterday, or what I am going to do tomorrow. Or what I might do next week. My entire presence is on what I am doing RIGHT NOW.

My family was able to cheer me on at the first event. During the block, my daughter, Jersey, would look up inspirational quotes and read them to me. One she found really hit home. “Start where you are. Use what you have. Do what you can.”

The first event is always tough. After such a long competitive break and knowing that many of the women I’m competing against didn’t take a competitive break- there are always nerves. But, it’s all about managing them.

When I was getting ready for the tour, I put a question out on Instagram. I asked if anyone had any advice for me starting this year’s tour. More than a few people responded with the comment to just “just be you.”

Maybe they said that because they were reflecting back to me the advice I always give out. I always tell other bowlers the same when they ask me for advice.  “Focus on the process. Don’t focus on the outcome. Don’t focus on the results. Just focus on what you can control. Don’t try so hard. Just BE.” I always say you will be your best on the lanes if you find a way to “just be.” But since we grew up in such a culture of, “Just try your best” sometimes it’s not easy to get out of your own way. 

Amirite?

We have to keep consistent by showing up authentically. I think that is my superpower out on the lanes. When I commit to that feeling of just being me, it propels me forward.

When we flip into “trying” mode, it messes with our game. Our swings get tighter. We pull down from the top of the swing. Everything is a mess.

When you are able to just “be,” you set yourself up to succeed. Effortlessly. You just let all your hard work up until that point lead you. Without overthinking any of it. When you try too hard, you can spiral down a rabbit hole of overthinking and over analysis.

Just BE and trust the process.

Easier said than done, right?

But that’s where your power lies. You have the power of being present because you control the decisions you’re making in the moment and where your mind is. All that other stuff is just a distraction blocking you from fully being you. 

So many times, you look around, you compare yourself to other people’s scores, you look at the standings, and you just worry about a whole bunch of stuff that you can’t control. But there should be no comparison allowed. We all have unique experiences that got us where we are. Our experience has everything to do with our own unique journey and nothing to do with anyone else’s.

So thank you, instagram friends, for reminding me.

I took my own advice – and yours – as I showed up on the lanes for the first few days of this year’s tour. I got out there and focused on the present in each shot. I allowed myself to just be… And I really did feel like my best self. 

I think every bowler, no matter what their experience level, has to be reminded once in a while.

In Rockford, a woman who has always read my blog and followed me online came up to talk to me. She said to me, “you know, you really do the things that you write about…and it’s so important for other people to know that you practice what you preach.” When she said that, I really felt it. I always hope that people see that. I am someone who is fully true to who I am and how I present myself.  I mean, if I don’t practice what I preach then why would you?

Last week, as she saw, I didn’t look around at the scoreboard. I was really focused on the process, on what I could control. All of that helped me be really present and allowed me to make that big cut. And I’m taking all that into this next big event, the Queens. I have been focused within and on the things that I can control. I’ll stay present.

Whatever happens on the lanes, I always know who I am. 

Next time you step out on the lane, remember that. Being truly you is everything you need to be in that moment. Everything else will follow.