My daughter has been proactively figuring out many things for herself lately. So, I’m taking a moment to step back and have another proud mom moment here. Because sometimes my kids never cease to impress me.

A couple of weeks ago, shortly after the Taylor Swift concert, Jersey became interested in making bracelets. So, I got her a cool new bracelet maker that helps put beads together. It is a mechanical bracelet maker and is a bit complicated. However, I didn’t have time to show her how it worked that day.

She disappeared into her room for a while the day she got it. Then, sometime later, she returned and said, “Mom, because I know that ‘everything is figureoutable,‘ I set up this bracelet maker already.” She literally said that.

And I almost cried. This is what I preach all day, every day! You can do it. You may not know how to initially, but you can figure it out when you try.

I asked her how she did it. 

Her reply, “I watched a bunch of YouTube videos. One of them, I watched like 50 times. And I kept pausing it and re-watching bits of it to make sure it was set up right. And I figured it out! That’s why I didn’t have to wait to ask for help.”

And did she ever figure it out!! She has actually streamlined her entire bracelet-making process. It’s like a little bracelet factory in her room now!

That isn’t all she has done, though. Last week, she told me about her Christmas list. Or rather, how she will present her list to us this year. She has decided to create a slideshow. So, she has started creating slides on Canva and then is moving them over to Google Slides to set up the presentation. I was like, “Wait, you are nine years old. How did you even know about Canva?”

And, like with the bead machine,  she already has the whole system figured out. She’s capturing links, downloading photos, and putting it all together. She even knows how to share the link.

It is also fascinating how innovative this idea is – especially when I think back to what I always used to do as a kid. We used just to circle stuff in catalogs. But I guess there’s the simple route, or there’s Jersey’s much more sophisticated route to communicating Christmas wishes! I also find it amusing because I consider myself a bit of a Canva and presentation wizard, but I have never talked to her about that. I mean, why would I? She was surprised I knew so much about it when I told her that.   

Honestly, I am already looking forward to her grand presentation, which should be in the next week or so. I told her that just after Black Friday is when I usually get focused on Christmas presents. So that gave her something else to figure out – how to manage a timeline.  

All of this has also made me step back for a minute and think, Yes! This is the type of child I want to raise!  One who realizes their own power and isn’t intimidated by not knowing something.

She has learned to automatically think, I can do this. I don’t know how yet, but I know how to figure it out. 

She isn’t afraid of what she doesn’t know. She has the confidence to go after it and stays focused on finding the solution. It makes me proud to see her constantly growing through what she teaches herself just as much as – maybe even more than – she is directly learning from others.  

I’ve written here many times before about how I have always been very intentional about teaching my kids these kinds of values. I think having that perspective of “everything is figureoutable” is a really good way to live. And clearly, Jersey has heard me say it enough that she is repeating it aloud.

If we give our kids the space to do things independently, they usually will be able to figure it out. I am so glad that I learned this as a mom, and I am so grateful for my kids learning those lessons too because it is making them into really strong, independent and confident kids.

When we are parents, we’re put in this position to guide our kids toward building that confidence.

So many parents don’t treat their kids like the capable humans that they genuinely are. I also think many parents just do everything for their kids or immediately show them how to do something because that’s easier or faster. Unfortunately, that gets in the way of that learning process.  

So John and I have always come from a place of giving them extra time to figure it out. And then, once they do, they feel so empowered. They have an opportunity to think for themselves and discover what they’re capable of on their own. Then, they also feel that sense of pride that comes along with doing something themselves.

When they gain that confidence when they are young, that confidence carries on through their through their entire life.

It isn’t a one-time confidence they are gaining. It’s a life-long confidence that comes from knowing they are very capable beings.