I was really moved by the response to the last post. It was a little bit surprising how many people shared it and commented. Clearly, there are many out there who can relate. One woman wrote, “I’m not even a pro. That article hit hard.”

The response opened up a conversation about professional bowler vulnerability.

When almost no one talks about their hard feelings or struggles, most people feel embarrassed to admit they are struggling when they go through something. Online and in social media, we see people excelling more than ever. But it’s not that more people are actually excelling. It’s just that their success is more public, and society teaches us that we should hide the struggle.

When things on the lanes aren’t going well for me, I don’t have a hard time saying I’m feeling off.  I’m just 100% authentic all the time. But so many people are too scared to show that side of their experience. Everything looks so picture-perfect online. It makes it easy to gloss over thinking about how that person got to each successful moment.

What most people aren’t talking about is the truth behind those moments. That along the way, they inevitably experienced lows. Everything wasn’t a win. There were losses and countless moments in the middle. And, most importantly, the highlights we see were not what got them there. We didn’t see the journey. We only saw the end result. But behind the scenes, they are going through it all.

There was struggle. 

Probably, even some tears.

There was doubt, and confusion. 

And it’s okay to struggle. That’s what we should be showing other bowlers. And that’s what we should be teaching our kids.

To be totally honest, the only thing steady and constant on this journey is that it is hard work…

Success doesn’t just happen. Getting to the top isn’t ever a straight line.

It’s something I mention often to my youth bowlers. Highs, lows and perseverance are all a part of any success story.

I was really proud of these PWBA bowlers who weren’t afraid to break the mold of the perfect picture online to open up with vulnerability about how they truly felt on this journey. That vulnerability really shows what they’re made of.

When I see people show themselves that way, I see their strength. They’re not sharing for attention. They are simply strong enough to be honest with themselves – and to those who look up to them – about what they are really experiencing. 

You’re going to have low moments, and that’s okay. That’s how you’re going to learn. Let the learning happen. Accept it as part of the journey, and don’t beat yourself up.

When you are not afraid to let your guard down, to really show yourself and your experience in this game, that’s bold. That’s admirable. That’s strength.

So, I applaud all of these PWBA bowlers who are strong enough to show their vulnerability and to show the world that it’s okay to struggle. 

Pretending to be perfect, when you know that is impossible to hold anyone to, isn’t fair to yourself or those around you. We’re all human. We shouldn’t try to hide the imperfect, feeling human side of our experiences. Real strength is being able to show the good as well as the bad.

So many people pretend that life and the highlight reel are the same. But that’s not reality. It’s missing something very important – the real journey. 

Everyone deals with low experiences and feelings differently. Some need a break. Some need to push through. Some need to go on a vacation. And there’s also no right or wrong way. But being true to what you are experiencing gives other people the strength – and permission – to be honest, too.

This is your permission to be – and to feel – all of the things on your unique journey.