I’ve never been someone who caves easily to peer pressure. In fact, saying “no” has been a guiding principle for most of my life—both on and off the lanes. And here’s the thing: saying “no” doesn’t mean you’re no fun. It doesn’t mean missing out. It just means you know exactly who you are and exactly what you stand for.

Throughout my bowling career and personal life, setting boundaries has played a major role in shaping who I am today. I’ve consistently said no to situations or activities that didn’t align with my values. No to drinking too much, no to drugs, no to situations that felt off, no to toxic people, and no to anything that could dull the clarity of who I truly am. The power of “no” is incredible—it’s kept me true to myself, clear-headed, and fully present.

Let me clarify: this doesn’t mean I live a boring life. Far from it! I love going out with my friends, exploring new places, and having fun adventures. The difference is, I always stay true to myself. I refuse to compromise my values just to fit in or feel accepted. By consistently setting these boundaries, I’ve avoided regrets, unnecessary drama, and many mornings spent nursing a hangover or wishing I’d made different choices.

Saying “no” has always been easy for me. Why? Because I’ve never worried too much about what others thought of my decisions. Sure, people talk—people always talk. But guess what? They’ll talk anyway, no matter what you do. Realizing this early on freed me from the trap of constantly trying to please others or fit into their expectations.

It felt empowering every single time I stuck to my boundaries. Each decision reinforced my strength and confidence. Knowing exactly who I was and being brave enough to show up authentically, even when it wasn’t popular, has given me an inner confidence that I carry everywhere—especially to the lanes.

The benefits have been clear and numerous: no hangovers, no bad decisions made in moments of weakness, no regrets. Instead, I’ve built a life I’m genuinely proud of, filled with meaningful connections, clarity of purpose, and consistent integrity. These decisions didn’t just keep my life on track—they’ve elevated my bowling as well, allowing me to remain focused, present, and always at my best.

If you’re someone who struggles with saying “no” or finds setting boundaries challenging, here’s the advice I’d offer: take time to know who you truly are. If you’re unsure, do the inner work necessary to discover yourself. The clearer you are on your values and identity, the easier it becomes to stand firm in your decisions. You’ll start to recognize that boundaries aren’t restrictive—they’re protective, empowering, and essential to becoming the strongest version of yourself.

When you truly know yourself, you can confidently say “no” to the things that don’t serve you and “yes” to the things that lift you higher. You’ll show up authentically, consistently, and unapologetically. And trust me—there’s nothing more powerful than being fully, wholeheartedly you.